Monthly Archives: August 2014

Post post.

Today’s been a bit of an annoying day, One of those days where I want to do loads, but things happen and then what I wanted to do didn’t happen. I just feel like having a curl up and hide. I was up all last night with Finn. Aphre is nice enough to let me have a night off tonight though so I can catch up on sleep.

I’ve just gone back over the last post and my other friends posts about similar things. I still feel like I have loads to say about the matter, but at the same time think maybe I shouldn’t. I don’t want to dwell on it too much because it’s times where I’ve not been the happiest and although I was able to overcome it from making fun of it, making others smile or just getting around it by working with people I liked, it’s kind of a reminder that those people aren’t around now and wonder which ones were as genuine as I thought they were. I don’t like thinking it but I think my mind looks for what it thinks is the most likely reason.

In good news… Ruby’s here on Sunday which is going to be fun. I do have to get a bloody long train again. Long as in length of the journey time wise not length of the actual train, that would be silly. It’s also my birthday next week. I’ve banned the phrase “Big Three – Oh” because it’s not big compaired to “The Big Five-Oh” which is really what the phrase is refering to… and 50 is bigger than 30… 30 is middle sized compaired to 50, and 60 is bigger than 50 (Because that’s how numbers work) so compaired to 60, 30 is not big at all so AHH!!! That’s like saying to a 10 year old “The big One-Oh” NO! BE CREATIVE.What I’m trying to get at is that 30 isn’t an age that is big. If i died tomorrow people would say “He was so young” and all that bollocks.

On the point of age though… I feel like after 29 years old… you stop being old and become OLD. like actual OLD old, not like that says your age, more of OLD as in to say old shoes or pens or printers. I’m from 1984 when George Micheal actually had hits and people watched Tommy Cooper or the Two Ronnies at christmas.¬†

I don’t know what I’m on about now. Oh also Iwon’t say where but I read something yesterday that made reference to me as “The Sperm Donor” which I thought was uhh… tactful.

Before I go to bed, I just want to go on about one more thing which has been nagging at me a few days. The first isn’t a huge one. The Job in Norwich didn’t happen. They employed someone who had slightly stronger skills in a certain area where I was told my best strengths were my technical skills but could do better with community engagement and employed someone with more of that experience. Fair comment, I kind of agree. I think I need to be in a role already to know what’s been done in a community rather than trying to actually think of something from an outsiders point of view and I need to figure that one out. I think maybe it was the case of that it could have been mine, but I wasn’t on the case that day ūüėõ

Tonight’s main feature is a reply from a Job I recently applied for and didn’t even get to the interviewing stages. There was a line in the reply that has really angered me where I really want to reply to the sender… but decided not to on the basis that it may put them off employing me if something else arises at their station.¬†

The email contained this:

“As¬†you’ve¬†got community radio experience, perhaps you could now try volunteering for local commercial radio stations next, to¬†expand your experience”

Right… so anyone who has not only read my blog (Which to be fair they wouldn’t have, if so, Hi) but if they bothered to read my CV (Which by the way is a creative CV, unlike the standard CVs you send off for an office Job) the person who wrote this would have seen that yes, I have had Community Radio experience between the years of 2007 – 2009 which by the way I helped set up and launch and was head of music, head of technical and trained new people, but would have also seen that in 2003 – 2005 I volunteered for dab COMMERCIAL radio station Swindon FM, 6 months as a volunteer at COMMERCIAL station Brunel FM (2007) and additional work experience at Brunel FM in 2009, volunteered at COMMERCIAL station Original radio in Bristol and at various other COMMERCIAL stations as work experience across the UK. I’ve also worked on student radio but mainly COMPLETED A FRICKING RADIO DEGREE. MY EXPERIENCE SPANS 11 YEARS… MORE EXPERIENCE??? MORE??? Also, It was for almost exactly the same type of job as the one in Norwich. The commercial station I applied for… it was an INSULT to say that. Also as one person who is on my facebook (Who by the way I respect as a talented broadcaster) said, you wouldn’t volunteer at tesco”,

I’m nearly 30 years old… I don’t need to do more free things any more!¬†I’m fighting off the temptation to send it anyway and I will but to not even bother reading it which they clearly didn’t do. My cover letter outlined the experience relevent to the job… not my whole experience… surely that’s why you asked for a CV!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Also I had a similar conversation with my girlfriend’s cousin’s boyfriend (Keep up) who suggested I tried the local stations and did free things. The thing is It’s not a hobby. I don’t sit at home playing radio like some sit playing legos or train sets. I stopped even bothering to try to explain because I don’t think he would have understood the industry I’ve decided to work in. He wouldn’t know that Heart actually comes from London and that there;s more to radio than presenting shows and theres producers and stuff, but also loads of other people who want to work there. I would have had to explain the whole thing though, which would have been a whole long boring story of the radio and why he was wrong and maybe insulted him and I didn’t want to do that because he’s a nice bloke.¬†

Right… I have vented. Maybe now I can forget about it and move on.

Depression… It’s a funny thing.

Ok, I’ve done the happy blog… It’s time to do a more serious post. I’ve put my happy music on in my headphones to get through it.

I’m not going to go on about it like I knew the guy but is genuinely saddening about the death of Robin Williams – especially for someone who looks into comedy and defines him as not only one of the greats, but he was comedy and it’s going to be a big dent to anyone who is a comedy follower. He’s had all the problems funny people have too, which is funny because the complete opposite side to laughter is sadness, but strangely they are so closely linked that it’s the ridicule of the sadness that makes others happy and gives temporary happiness to the person who had to deal with it.

A person with problems might have their OK head on Tuesday afternoon and think “That’s ridiculous… how could I ever think that… that’s silly” but on Thursday evening you’re in your basement flat after Uni watching Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy to take your mind off things, fall asleep 4 times because it’s shit, wake up and find your Ben & Jerrys has melted and really think “Fuck This” and spend 4 days in bed with all the lights off and the curtains closed until I had to go out for more Icecream and dvds or¬†Uni. It was a regular thing. (btw at this point i’ve just realised “Rock the boat” has gone round and round on repeat on my player for some reason). From this comparison you can tell I have experience.¬†

For ages it’s been obvious (I think) that I’ve had some sort of depression, for from at least 2011 and various times it’s seeped into the blog. In fact I have tried to hide the fact that I was on medication – not because you guys would see it and I’d be judged – but because I was going through some important battles at the time which were causing it and I felt that if certain people saw that they would use it against me.¬†

It’s not just about the life I had before uni, but the stuff that’s happened since. My mind was kept occupied with drama and bad things happening at home that when I started uni, my head was kind of clear… and that’s when it all kicked in along with the battle for Ruby. Anyway this is turning into a me thing which isn’t the intention. The point I’m trying to make is that Comedy for many funny people escapism and it can happen to anyone. The strange thing about it is that we always appear to be the ones that are happy in life.

When I told my sister I was on anti-depressants¬†she said “That’s ridiculous, you ARE an anti-depressant” which was a nice compliment, but it hit home as to how others saw me. I achieved what I wanted but I think really I got nothing from doing that. I think it’s supposed to be a temporary thing but it just gets bigger and bigger and for me there seemed no way of stopping it.¬†

When I heard about Robin Williams I remembered the stuff I’d heard about him and drugs and alcohol and all the struggles he had, and to me I just think that he must have fought so hard but to be hit with something new once things seemed sorted, it must have been so painful to have so much going on in you’re head that effects your feelings and everything. Hearing about it makes me think how someone in the world felt like that and knowing where I’ve been and how I’ve felt with the times I’ve had to deal with it, it’s really sad to hear – especally someone who made others happy. I know the pain¬†ad to think someone had that pain, probably a thousand times more than me, it’s just.. grrr! Things just constantly bombard you even if they should be good or things.

Mine happened the first time just after the first Ruby battle.¬†I got the go-ahead to see her and have her in Swindon, and everything should have been good. In reality that’s where things were at their worst. I tried to reach out to people but they didn’t seem interested, other than my friend Hayley who I’d been talking loads to at the time and had support from her. I suppose some people don’t realise until something happens in their life that kind of changes that perspective.

Anyway since then I’ve had a couple of wobbles, and I’ve got Aphre to prop me up and help me see clearly about things, as well as Hayley, Mel and Jelmer if things don’t go so great. I use my work as a help too so thanks to Code Red and the other projects. I know some people don’t have the support network but I’m always there for my friends who¬†are struggling with it. For me it helps to have someone physically there. For others it’s different and there’s charities out there and the doctor is there to help and not judge. There’s nothing wrong with you if you do have problems, Blame it on the serotonin.¬†


Hii! Ok so this is the first of two blogs. The first is a follow up from the last blog and the second is just a regular post. The reason I didn’t blog sooner by the way is that I do most of it on my pad… and it died an unexpected death. Blogging on the computer is a little bit of a pain when you need to feed a little one at the same time. If you don’t want to read my splurge about TV and a comedy show review… go to the next blog.

So in the last blog I said that I’d be talking about the problems with breakfast Television. It’s rather simple really but it makes shit loads of sense. Basicly the ITV has a poor excuse of a TV breakfast news show. The reason it’s a poor excuse is mainly because it’s ITV trying to do the BBC’s job when the BBC are always going to do this the best… ALWAYS. However the ITV was doing something different with it’s previous things, TVAM and GMTV. As soon as they got rid of that and gave fucking Lorraine Kelly her own TV show (Which by the way she is hardly ever there which makes the show name “Lorraine” fucking pointless). Before Daybreak they had a variety at breakfast.

Channel 4 did it’s own thing too eventually with the Big Breakfast. That was successful because it was something different. The only reason Ri:se on Channel 4 didn’t work was because it tried to do a cool take on the news. I think this is where it’s all failing. Big breakfast had news but it was done given a slot rather than being ALL THE WAY THROUGH!

ITV needs to move away from being factual and being fun. The BBC arn’t doing that. The funnest times on the BBC was when they had the saturday morning programmes like Going Live or Live And Kicking. I know the that in the 80s the ITV (In its more daring times) had Tiswas and tried an adult version called O.T.T. They were on to something but maybe more toned down.

This country’s TV stations are too afraid to be daring. The US has shows like the Daily show and Saturday Night Live. Why don’t we? Yeah we have Jonathan Ross and Graham Norton but really they are not doing what the others do. What’s wrong with a bit of satire at breakfast or something to keep us glued to the TV so we want to skip work and not leave the house until it’s finished?

If TV is made like this… why not make it something we can get on our computers or phones to stream. Not many people know that because we can stream audio to our phones via things sich as tunein radio, you could actually stream video. The downside is that it might go through a tunnel when you’re on a train and might lose signal, but if you’re on a bus or something or even going from one side of a city (London?) to another you won’t lose signal and loads of phone tariffs have unlimited data so why not?

If ITV want an audience, they need to do something different than the BBC. They need to tap into a new fresh audience instead of the one they are losing. I get frustrated over the stupidest things, and it frustrates me that very much like radio, a lot of the TV channels are trying to do the same as the rest and meaning the variety is lost.

Also channel 4 is missing out on the audience it could potentially reach now the game has slightly changed. It would be great to see a radio type breakfast show on TV… I know Moyles hasn’t had the best TV success but it would be ace to see him and someone else he has chemistry with or even just two people with ace chemistry to present a new show. It’s that and the type of show that made the big breakfast what it was. It was only going down hill at the time because of a lull… and it probably would have got it’s audience back if it slightly adapted.

Anyway… enough of that… time for this week’s reviews of shows I’ve watched on my NOW TV box.

The Week Tonight With John Oliver.

So I’ve watched this and although the general format is like the Daily Show, It’s just as good. It is an american show (On Sky Atlantic) and it is a satirical news programme poking fun at all the bad things happening in the world. It’s what I’ve been banging about that we’re missing shows like this in the UK. We have the 10 o’clock show for about 5 minutes in this country. It’s pretty cool though and would suggest that if you can get it you should watch it. 9/10 golden goose symbols.

Adam Buxton’s Bug

Also on Sky Atlantic, Bug contains Adam Buxton – who I always find entertaining ever since the Adam and Joe show. It started a few years ago… yeah and I guess I’m a little slow on the uptake, but still I’ve not seen it before so it’s like some sort ot WOWgasm. It pokes fun at the internet and also has some things that Buxton has created in collaboration with other youtube people.

Here’s one of the things made for Bug

10/10 Golden Goose Symbols for that one.

Set list: Stand up without a net

I like this show… I think it’s more comedy how I like it. The comedians are forced to make things up on the spot from a subject behind them on a screen. If you like whose line is it anyway you’ll like this. Also it’s not to a massive audience like an arena, its in comedy clubs which is pretty ace when they get big names of the best comedians from all over. Over-all 9 out of 10 golden goose symbols.

I watched it today and coincidently episode 2 series 1 has Robin Williams (who died yesterday for those of you who live under rocks). This isn’t the one I saw… but it shows off the genius at work making shit up and being funny as fuck. Enjoy! RIP Robin Williams

Now Televisual Time

Today’s blog focuses not so much on life but mainly on one of my favourite subjects, the TV. I recently purchased a Now TV box and have been watching some of the things on that… mainly comedy, but todays blig will be a critique on the workings of Now TV, some of the programmes on it and some of the gripes I have with the whole TV thing.

You can tell that I’ve been missing writing essays. By the way I started writing it yeserday and didn’t get chance to finish it,

Now TV
I’ve had it on since I got the box and baught the films package cause Ruby was here and disney is always the word, and the  entertainment package so we could watch some of the shows (as detailed below). The good stuff: I can get sky 1 and sky atlantic and comedy central live and without a dish, and some on demand stuff. I dont get all the channels on sky but I think its basically a cut the bullshit out type thing.

Also its got all the on demand services from itv, bbc, channel 4 and the useless channel 5.

Bbc – The iplayer is really good as usual, easy to use, easy to find things and stuff, but it doesn’t have box sets like 4od. The main issue is that it cuts the titles off everything so when you wants to watch something it comes up as “the history of the wheel – when the …”

Itv player – its alright but firstly its not the best to use, can’t find things so easily. It doesn’t have a back catalogue of classic shows… infact I could not find any watchable or interesting shows.

4od – its amazing, lots of good content but the only problem is he layout. I use it on a little tv and everythings so small as it is. It looks a little squished.

5 ondemand – same as itv really but worse, atleast it has some sort of comedy section. Everything else is shit on it.

The other “apps” available are ok but not the best to use. I think hey are standard channel formatted in a way that bombards you with picturee and a speech bubble that means nothing.

some frustrating things that doesn’t exist that should on these days of tv…
1) why can I not make a playlist? Essentially making your own channel and watch the things I want in order and not have to keep picking. Infact pick a playlist while watching it.
2) why is not everything on a united player? I could search all programmes on the main channels or all the comedy programmes and have my own comedy playlist or comedy channel.
3) why is there not a service that alerts you when a programme of your favourite subject is going to be on… like if I wanted to be alerted about programmes to do with trains then it would tell me that bbc4 has train night or something.
4) why do none of them have exactly the programmes that were added to the service on that day, so if bbc iplayer had “added today” it would have all the stuff up regardless of the channel.

I think what I might to is review a show weekly that I’ve not seen before. Heres a small list of shows I’ve watched and a summary.

I watched it and I found bits funny but it didn’t really do it for me. I watched the first 3 episodes. I may watch the others if I run out of things to watch.

The daily show
I enjoyed this. I watched it ages ago when it was on more 4 but haven’t seen it since. It’s on comedy central… the main reason i wanted to get the entertainment package was for comedy central and as soon as Aphre saw the daily show on there she got excited too.

Midnight beast
I feel like I should have liked this. I didn’t. I watched the first 10 minutes and I switched it off.

Cardinal burns
Watched 3 minutes. Switched it off. It was utter shit. How did it even get a second series. Sorry.

Noel fieldings luxury comedy
I liked it, it made me smile more than laugh out loud but some bits did.

Alan Partridge, mid morning matters
I enjoyed it, its about radio and a failing presenter and being on air. Again not totally laugh out loud but makes me smile.

Tomorrow I will blog about breakfast tv.

In other news, I have a radio job interview next week in Norwich. YAY!

Right… time for bed.