Monthly Archives: December 2006



On Xmas day at some time in the morning, The popular nightclub where i used to work caught fire!! Kinda found it rather amusing after what the bossed put me through! They obviously havnt been looking after the building, When the old bosses were there these things never happened, and 2 incidents have already happened.

It’s a shame that the staff i used to work with are being messed around. One of my good mates are going though shit with the bosses, a bit like i had. You can do a good job in that place and it wont get you anywhere.

Anyway the mad thing is that when we drove into halifax 2 days b4, i pointed at the building and said that buildings going to burn down (I usually point and say random things about places i’ve had bad experiences with). But the wierd thing is that when i used to work at that building when the celing fell down, i was talking to my mate and said “The place is too old, Its gonna fall down”, that night it did (Part of it). I think i must be psycic. I predicted a few other things this year that happened so when i say some sort of random thing… it might just happen

I Had a Mad Xmas. I’d woken up around 11am the day b4 we turned up, most of us had no sleep at this point, besides from a bit in the car. On the day we turned up my Auntie Debbie was having a birthday party. My cousen Sophie and i were upstaging bob on the dance floor. In the end when the party had done bob drove off leaving my dad and i stranded (bob drove us there, he’s been a right ass hole all day) so we went to my Auntie Jeanie’s where we finally got some sleep. My uncle peter gave me a fire sausage from the curry place down the road and some sort of curry.

On Xmas eve i was helping out at Clayton Liberal Club for a few hours. Afterwards we stayed for a few drinks and Gordon (My dads cousen) and i left about 5am after having a chat. Gordon locked the club keys and the house to the club’s keys in the club so we had to walk from Clayton to Thornton at Half past 5 in the morning on Xmas Day. we got to a Phone box about 6 and i phoned my dad to come and get me at 8. He said call him at 8, and he’d pick me up. I was well cold!!!

got back to bobs where it was freezing and went to sleep for a few hours. Woke up at 11 on xmas day. My dad was really ill so couldnt go to my auntie Debbie and uncle Chris’s Xmas dinner so i went. I’d got a bottle of Vodka for xmas from carolines mum and dad so took that with me to the xmas dinner to share. After xmas dinner sophie and i went on the computer and just watched things on you tube till DR Who was on, then we watched TV, Drank more, Had Play Fights and then i went back to bobs. I had been drinking alcohol since i’d got to yorkshire and for some reason i couldn’t get drunk i lost count on how many bottles i’d had and put more vodka in! the bottle of vodka was nearly finished, me spohie and my other cousen joe and been drinking it.

Boxing day i went to Carolines Grans house and had some food and a chat, then went to her mums. Wednesday I’d met up with Dave, Saw some people i used to work with, Met up with claire and went back to bobs… Who said he’d be there.

Got to bobs, Rang my dad. They were at the pub way down the road and said walk up to them, We had too much stuff and said that him and my dad can come to us as they got a car. Bob was still being a nob. claire dropped her bag and a bottle of wine broke. She took all the stuff out so her other stuff didnt get wet and she cut her finger.

The bloke from down the road came past with his dog, and back again. Bob had got him involved in an argument we’d had when i lived there and bob was doing things like putting broken TVs, Chairs, Cabinets, Glass and rubbish outside his door (He has no garden, just a footpath outside his terrest house) He came past saying “you better not put any more of that shit outside that house again” I explained that i didn’t live there and i havn’t for 10 months and that it was bob. “AYE FOOKIN KNOOH, BOT YAH YOOSTA” (giving claire the Evils) I said it wasnt me, it was bob. He walked off “I know who it fuckin was, So don’t fucking do it again” He then said some other stuff that finally blew my Fuse and i walked up to him (Dave walked off round the corner and Claire was trying to tell me to leave him alone, like i was going to hit the bloke or something)

I suppose this is proof that i’ve lived up here too long, Cos i’d thought i’d speek on a northen level “YOU’D BETTER GET YOUR FUCKING FACTS RIGHT BEFORE YOU OPEN YOUR FUCKING MOUTH. BOB MADE YOU LOOK LIKE A FUCKING MUG AND HE DOES IT WITH EVERYBODY, YOU DIDNT EVEN ASK WHY WE WERE WAITING” Man walks off with his dog back home.

Comes back 5 mins on the phone to bob. Puts Phone Down. walks up to me ina stress “WHAA DID YA FOOKIN THREATEN MEH?” he says. I tell him that i didnt threaten him, i said he’d better get his facts right b4 opening his mouth and asked him why he thought we were outside. he calmes down a bit and told him what had happened. Said to him the last person he should ever listen to is bob, he does it on perpous to get him wound up and he laughed. he goes “well look, i dont want any more shit out side this house.” Thought i’d better leave it there b4 it gets flaired up again.

3 hours later, we were off home.

Whats happening at brunel FM????

Ok, dont sound like brunel FMs kit is working very well. They just had a recorded DJ talking over half way through a song, Then they had a promo and a song started half way thorough and then a jingle and then 2 jingles half way through the song.

The DJ hasn’t spoken for ages now. It sounded a bit like Swindon FM did when someone who didnt know how to use the on-air computer was playing with it (Happened often but i was on to show them what to do.

I noticed that the TLRC pc’s seem to like playing up. On Brunel various times, i’ve heard the computer start a song, play 3o or 10 seconds of it then cuts into a break or the news. Are they using Quick Pics or something?? I know that GWR uses Encodad and they cant play a song into the news, Maybe thats what Brunel and the TLRC stations have. The reason i say this is they are a big company, and Home FM seem to have the same problem.

Seems like they need to learn how to use the kit so it dont do that

Get me in!!!!!!!

A Mad Phone Call

I wake up this morning to the phone ringing… A Scottish Man asks for John (My dad) and where is he. I explain that he was out last night and isnt in at the moment. He asks me if i’m John’s Son. I tell him yes. He says “Oh that would make me your grandad then” and we had a bit of a chat.

I’ve never seen my grandad ever and only spoke to him once about 1 and a half years ago. They split up when my dad was a little kid. He lives in scotland (Being Scottish and all). It was just propper mad that i’m woken up by my grandad that i’ve never met who lives on the other end of the uk.

I asked my dad if he’s do a bit of an uncle bob and turn up out of nowhere. he said he used to but he’s 72 years old so the chances of that are that he probably wont. But dont mean i cant do that… but i’d better bring my dad, hehehe.

(When i get enough money to do it!!!!)


I’m once again on hold for job center. been on 3 mins and phone answered!

I didn’t get my money till monday. They sent me a letter about Back Pay and said i wasn’t intitled to any pay till i gave them the form back. so right now again i have No Money (Got food with it but havnt got any Xmas Shopping at all!!!). Went to the job center yeserday and told them the situation and they sent that off. Spoke to the woman on the phone today and said they havn’t recived anything yet and when they do they probably wont pay me till after xmas.

THIS TAKES THE FUCKING PISS!!! I HAVE BEEN ON THE FUCKING WAITING LIST FOR EVER AND THEY STILL HAVN’T SORTED ANYTHING. Complaining to them would probably be no good because everybodys complaining.

I’m going to write a sketch when i get on the radio about a job center person who you never see because she’s always on the phone and sends you letters 2 weeks 2 late. She also dosen’t know anything about anybodys claim and everything takes 3 months to do.

the job centeres should all be abolished and a new service introduced with a completly different way.

The National Insurance number (N.I Number) would be traceable. It would be on the Job centeres computers as soon as they sign on. if they are working an alarm will go off at the job center. This alarm would go off if they got a job and the NI number was entered into the NINGA (National Insurance Number Grid Agency) which companys enter the NI number so the DWP know whats happening. If they are working and claiming they would be questioned by the the DWP. This would hold information on how much this person was on, How their employment ended, Where they live and Tax Information. The Inland Revenue could use this information. That way if somebody has your stolen N.I Number this person could be caught.

This way when it comes to making a claim you can go to the job center, see somebody and you would only have to do a tiny bit of paperwork. They pay you from the date you last got paid. If you reqire to see somebody you could actually see them instead of having to spend forever in a que on the phone.

it seems like they r still running on an old service and this would sort stuff out for alot of people

I’m on the phone to jobcentre now

Managed to get into the job centres annoying music area. theres a bit in the song that sounds like psycho’s “wheee wheee wheee” bit when the woman gets stabbed.

it was a change because i rang the direct number and got through stright away! still got the music tho and that takes its time

Music loops 3 times

Yawn – – da da da da da da di- da, da-di-da…..

music loops again

Caroline wakes up (asleep on the sofa next to the PC) “Whats all the racket” Sorry i cant turn the music off

da dee dee deee daa dooo (not police)

Psycho area comes up again

fiddle diddle fiddle diddle

music ends

music starts SHUT THE FUCK UP


my dads teling caroline how much child support agency wants off my dad (my mums a slapper … eg looks like her face has been slapped by a wet fish… actually, looks like a wet fish. she scammed him out of money… then called child support agency saying he’d not paid her anything to help out)

Music loop

they spend the money on cars, and hifis that they sell on ebay or at a cheeper price

Flask back on jellied eels and peanut butter sandwich

They’ve usualy answered by now.

Carolines been up for a while now (Music loop) askin me if im still on hold

yawn (psycho bit)

Come on!!!!!!!!!!!

big yawn

i think i’l time the loop when it comes along again

I’m learning the words to this off by heart (There is no words)

its at the bit that sounds like a carpet advert

loop start 13:06:30

7th time music has looped

still going 2 mins later


13:10:00 loop ends

restarts i’l have been here 36 mins by 13:14:30 if my calculations are correct

I should be in the world records!! longest hold on the telephone… however ive been on to BT for an hour

music loops


Bare with me lady asks

not finalised

not processed!

emergency payment… yes please!!

Something Sorted!!! emergency payment and someones going to call

Not processed yet!?!?!?! theyve had the claim since last tuesday!

Takes the piss

Update so far

Well got fired just over a month and 3 weeks now. Now i can’t see any point of me getting a job before the new year as thats when i’l be needed during the Christmas and new year week and im going away a few days B4 Christmas.

Since getting here i’ve been on job seekers (First time in nearly 2 years). Since then I’ve signed on 3 times and HAVN’T BEEN PAID!!!

So this one goes out to the job center wankers who cant be assed to sort my claim out quick enough… And that annoying mozart song (or whatever it is) when your trying to call them. Its not relaxing… ITS ANNOYING. Atleast if you put something more better on like a radio station or better songs and not that classical shit. I have not had any money for a whole month now (I got a few loans). I recon the jobcenter should be privatised. Atleast then you have a choice (That way i can decide not to ever go back to that service and go somewhere else and post that up)

You know how they changed it so you now don’t have to line up at the job center anymore… Really i think that way was better off… U know why??

I feel like I’ve been in a line since day one of signing. If there were still ques at the job center this mess would of been sorted out ages ago.

I’ve been very patent and usually somebody in my frame of mind would be shouting at a job center person right now. (Actually be throwing the furniture or even burning the place down… But i’m not because i’m nice like that)

And every time i wake up i check my bank balance, Then call job center and the line is always busy (I wake up at about 12, i still go to bed at 4am from the nightclub working) so how many other people have this problem??

Takes the piss (Meanwhile back in halifax, dave mentions that “The only thing that takes the piss is your mothers dialisis machine” or something like that… quoting chubby brown, Ohh and that i’l be getting “FUCKALL” For christmas.

Thats a point… Theyd better hurry the fuck up!!